Kobis

assalamualaikum dear diary! xoxo! hahahaha..
 i have missed so much of updates on my blog but later we catch up okay!
sekarang nak cerita tentang kobis dan husband. (yap! saya dh berhusbanddddd ) hahaha

Dulu dulu sebelum menjadi seorang isteri, selalu lah sebagai kononnya nak jad bakali isteri dia yang pandai masak dan rajin masak (kononnya k) selalu bawa bekal untuk bagi si dia rasa dan makan. Kahkah sweet kannnnnnn. *mata ke atas..

Lalu terjadinyalah kisah ni, semasa itu.. saya masih berkerjaya di Sebuah kedai buku, jadi seperti biasa... saya akan berjumpa dengan si dia ni antara waktu rehat saya atau sesudah habis kerja. Kebetulan masa tu semangat nak masak membara dan kecintaan saya kepada dia membuatkan saya begitu rajin yer nak bawak bekal ke tempat kerja. Menu pada hari itu adalah kobis putih goreng campur kentang and nugget dan ayam instant (ayamas maybe) (wahkaulagi) (semuainstanttinggalgorengje) (masakapekebendahahahaha) . Masa tu tak reti sangat masak tskk end up saya masak kobis ada halia. yer sayur ada halia k. HALIA.. damnnn that taste... hahahahaha..

Masa dah bagi dia rasa tu... nugget dh sejuk, ayam tak masak masih ada darah dan kobis berhalia.dan kentang masih keras . Memikirkan bagaimana berlakonnya dia untuk merasai hidangan dari Hell saya membuatkan saya begitu "damnnnnn taknak ingat boleh tak!!!!" hahahahah..

Dan semenjak kawin ni, saya selalu terperasan yang hubby saya ni kalau ada kobis mesti dia kuis2 ketepi kobis tu atau tak ambil lauk yg berkobis. Then I ask him "tak suka kobis ke"

"tak sangat"
"tak suka sayur yang putih dan keras2"

dan saya pun barulah tersedar... akan kejadian bagi bekal yang mega tak sedap tu dan betapa endure nya dia menghabiskan bekal itu.. Siap puji sedap.. tapi dia bagi kritikan "lain kali tak sayur tak boleh letak halia bla bla bla.."

HAHAHAHAHAHA..

dan he is always the judge of my cook..

sebab tu kalau nak masak untuk dia, pressure nak bagi masakan tu PERFECT sangat susah, memandangkan i am never a good cook. SERIOUSLY.

ada hari kurang garam
ada hari terhangus
ada hari tak cukup rasa..

menjadilah kita seperti master chef di hari hari yang memerlukan saya masak untuk dia..

tapi hubby kalau kita masak tak sedap mana pun mesti dia kata

"okay je"
"sedap laa"

dan diselangi perkataan "tapi jangan, tapi kena bubuh" hahahahahahha


itu sahaja! later i updates lain bye muah!

its been a long long....long time..

Ya Allah ya Rabbi..

Hai blog! I HAVE MISSED YOU SO MUCHHHHHH!!

and now i have lost of words...

where do I start?

Em.

my life updates.

There are so many things going throughout last yeat and this year.. 

Seriously serious. Big things... and to make it short (lol) i will just make it with point version.

• I've went to Umrah..Visited the Makam of Rasullah and Kaabah was the most calming phase in my life. It was so blessful to be there and i am missing Both Madinah and Mecca so badly that i can feel my heart trembling of wanted to go there again.. K. I wanted to share some pictures but the apps wont let me.. Blogger apps are seriously sucks and this is the nicest among the worst that actually allowed me to login.

• I AM ENGAGEDDDDDD ! yeah. Engaged. hahahahahaha but not with the hemmmm. It is with the 😍😍😍😍😍😍. Hahahahaha. I know that this is so awkward because i have been using this blog to express my "so called devoted crush" but ALHAMDULILLAH we ended up with nothing despite my craziness towards him. I found my Real Love remember? And I AM SO GRATEFUL THAT I ACTUALLY FATED TO BE WITH HIM.. only Allah knows how much he completes me in every ways.. He is the kind of rezeki that Allah gives me.. and i am blessed Ya Allah.. may our fate cross till Jannah.. amin.. amin..amin..

• I AM GETTINGGGGGGGG MARRIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!....!!!!!!!!!!! on this upcoming March.... dont know whether i could be a good wife but eventually we will be right? after the life of marriage begins? just pray for me and both of us actually...

and.. thats all for now.

Till we meet again!

-the lost blogger hahahahahahahahakbai

sayaaaaaaaaaaaaaang!!

Hari tu.. hari kebiasaan waktu bekerja , bila dah tak ada kerja dekat ofis maka melepakla kita dekat cashier secara berjemaah. Bagus budak budak ni..bagi kerja sekejap je dah setel. Lepas tu memasing mengadu tak ada keje. Tapi taklah memasing, ada yang workaholics tu macam tu la panas punggung bila takde keje. Kalau saya, medium. Bagi kerja saya buat, takda kerja buat je la cara macam takda kerja. LEPAK. bahahahahaha..

So.. nak dijadikan cerita ni..satu petang bergurau gurauan di cashier..saya mengusik la kawan saya yang dok mesej2 dengan sayang dia kat hanfon.. Kawan saya tu bubuh nama girlfriend dia  as 'sayang'.. Kebetulan ada pakcik tengah nak bayar kat cashier dengan anak dara dia. Entah mana datang ringan mulutnya, saya pergi cakap dekat pakcik tu

"pakcik...tengok ni haaa budak budak zaman sekarang, bukan main bercintanyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.. dok panggil panggil sayang. Belajar pun tak habis, umur dia ni baru sembilan belas ni pakcik..hishh apa la nak jadi.."

Pakcik tu pun sengih sengih sambil hulur duit.. Saya dengan kawan saya tadi dah gelak dgelak dah. Padahal dia umur dah 23 dah.. BAHAHAHHAHA.. Tiba tiba pakcik tu cakap

" takpela...sayang betul la tu..dah letak nama sayang"

Gulp.

Betul cakap pakcik tu..

Sebab saya pun letak my future husband nama kat hanfon as "sayang"

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

talam dua muka tak tuduh orang. heeeeee kbai,

p/s: i love you so much future husband. <3

life goes on..

hai .. 

assalamualaikum dear blog............

LONG TIME NO SEEE HUHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! You must be missing me a lot kan kan kan...

The last entry that i have been blogged is... about me thinking of what life would be after finishing my study and here it goes....

I am currently working at Borders as a MT(i do not want to tell you what is mt is harhar), for 4 months already and now entering the fifth month and to be honest... it is not the work that i would want for my career... unplanned work.. i came to Borders just to ask if there is any vacancy for part timers or full timers and plan to work there until i got my scroll and GRADUATE (will tell you more laterrrr below hewhew) but now.... still stuck in that place.. Oh, i cannot use the word 'stuck' as it will somehow make all of you think that the job is not entertaining..it is.. but... gosh.. shift work hours, and have to works during public holiday and have to wear t-shirt everyday is so MEHH.. but lets just be grateful of how that place has been .. em.. quite... fun.. and more importantly the reason for Allah to let me taste of 'rezeki hasil titik peluh sendiri'...

I have been emailing my resumes to several companies already.. and some (two companies) called me , came to one interview but later rejected the offer because mom thought that the job is not worth it, and second company... i think i failed myself lulzz because i talk nonsense during the phone interview and the company wants immediate person and ....

Anyway.. hey!! I GRADUATED ALHAMDULILLAH!! was so scared about getting the repeat semester..but.. 

here kemek face with her beautiful and ... i dont know. im so speechless of how thankful i am to her...


the funny thing about my graduation day is i am so excited that i have been asking her hundreds time " MAMAAA DID YOU SEE ME ON THE SCREEN GETTING THE SCROLL...MAMAAAAA DID YOU SEE ME ON STAGE MAMA DID YOU SEEE MEE!!!????" seriously no jokes.. that was the question of my life.. haha.. because i wanted to make her feels happy as one of her children.. graduating.. and yeah... thank you for all my family and friends during the day...and for him too.. thank you..

blog... i am now no longer like my so called 'crush' anymore.. i am going to tell you in the next entry and to excite you.. alhamdulillah.. Allah showed me the man of my life.. laterrrrr k later.. hihi

bye!

FINISHED

guess what dear humannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn,

i just finished my degree's life! on the 13th January 2015. ahaks. it means no moreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee studyyyy and all that assignments (except you know, if i repeat but lets not just talk about it). Tadika's life, primary's school life, high's school life, foundation's life and now degree's life. I have absolutely succeed in overcome the hardships of learning all those stuffs which are quite adventurous and fun and lovable (i just have to admit it since those moments are the only places that i've got the opportunity to met with my friends and etc) despite of my taksukabelajar mood was always on and rarely took a break. kahkah. but who cares.

i am an adult now..

and despite of all the times that this is the time that i have been waiting for is already passed, i have to enter into the whole new world by means, i have to started thinking like seriously sit down and have that serious face of what should i do after this.

tskkkkk..

and i hate thinking.
i hate to think about the future, i just wanted it to be smooth and to think that there are ways of how to survived and i just need to follow the ways but hey life isn't easy ya know.

and thinking.

but lets not just do some thinking. action bro. but i havent done with thinking yet.

kerja apa nak cari, kerja apa yang sesuai (whichisnone) kerja apa yang best dan tak susah untuk belajar, yang penuh dengan kesukaan, dengan gaji yang tinggi, cuti yang banyak but tssssssskkkkkkkkkkk...

tapi semoga Allah memudahkan segalanya. i hope..and walaupun saya nak jadi suri rumah je, berdoalah supaya rezeki bakal suami saya dipermudahkan, and kalau tak pun berdoalah supaya hidup selepas ini saya akan menjadi kuat untuk mengatasi segala rintangan.


bai

an old grandma lappy

so..i said to mom that my beloved laptop had broken, the malfunction keypad, annoying web browsers that too, screwed up and etc. and she as always, being so generous of not buying me new one (i should get one with my own money later yeah i know) not expecting much from her, gave me this one laptop that she said she bought it at second hand, and even opened it up for me, while tried to connect into our wifi house. it was awkward seriously. not my mom. but the laptop. the laptop seems like it is heavier than any rock that big as 10 balls when you merged it into one. but not just imagining it as ball, but rock okay. and plus, the way my mom trying so hard to use the mouse cursor without mouse ( kekunci or what? the one yg tak payah pakai mouse tu, demm i didnt know the word but let just assume you know it okay? ahaha) and yeah, i was still awkward. like super awkward. i mean.. what kind of era has this laptop been. it must be during the earlier 20s when laptop was just invented. i definitely think so until i confirmed it by myself, after trying to open the laptop by my own self with little hope that it might works well.

and the hope is just crushed into lunatic cringe lullaby as i heard weird cengkerik noise coming from the laptop, after about 3 minutes to come just to the screen play. like who waits for 3 minutes to staart playing the laptop?!??????!!!! even windows 8 doesnt make you wait. oh technology..

but this is not technology...

i just need a new one. i am now thinking where can i get money as soon i finished my final examination cause i want to hike right away, but mom assured me that she will not gives me any more hike money because she has a whole new bigger responsibility which makes me quite sad that she doesnt know how to differentiate spending it between her childrens and the other external party but lets not talk about it, because i have to believe that rezeki Allah itu luas..and i should try giving out my effort to earn it..not depending on my mom, but meaning of earning it hubmyself means that inhave to wait until one more month to hike again. ( working..hemm) 

but whats again?

nvm.

bukan saya tak sayang

tapi saya selalu lupa nak jenguk awaaaaaa . oh my baby blog. lepas dah lapang sikit saya update pasal G7 graduation saya, tentang hati dan perasaan saya, tentang crush tak guna saya, dinner pra graduasi dan lain lain okay. muah banyak ciked my baby blog 😘😘

Jalan jalan Manja di Gunung Tebu

8/08/-10/08

Memandangkan, betis seluruh urat ku masih rasa ketegangan akibat 'jalan jalan' di gunung tebu, eloklah saya menampalkan sedikit memori memori yang masih terbias di benak memori sebelum ianya lari dibawa kabus memori memori yang menumbuhi berganti baru. Ceh,

Jadi bulan ramadhan yang lepas ternyata membuatkan saya terpaksa merehatkan diri dari mendaki segala kehijaun bumi, mengenyahkan nafsu mahu menghirup bauan daun daunan yang merekah, membantutkan sekudrat tenaga dari bertapak di jalanan yang penuh wangian tanah. Dan akhirnya, setelah ramadhan berpergian jauh untuk kesekian kalinya (kedatangan mu ku nanti), saya mengambil peluang untuk mendaki Gunung Tebu. 

Gunung Tebu  terletak di negeri Terengganu ya dan saya tak pasti gunung itu dipenuhi tebu atau tidak. Yang pastinya banyak pokok bonzai dan kemumut yang mengasyikkan nakalnya. 

Perjalanan ke Gunung tebu bermula dari Hutan Lipur Lata Belatan, dan pendakian di jangka akan mengambil masa 6 ke 7 jam dengan full body. Oh ya trip ini berlangsung 2 hari 1 malam, dan disertai oleh 18 orang manusia yang semuanya masya ALLAH menyeronokkan belaka. 

Pendakian dimulakan dengan regangan secara berkumpulan diketuai oleh tkdindan doa yang ikhlas dituturkan oleh jed. Jam macam biasalah buat orang yang tak memakai jam macam saya ni, tidak dapatlah saya simpulkan dan nyatakan pukul pukul berapa sampai ke kem ni kem ni. Hanya anngaran masa syok syok sendiri je menjadi penentu. Maaf..Jadiiiiiiiiiiiiii rasanya gerak pagi tu pada pukul 9.30 ke 10.00 pagi. Jalan mula mula akan menaiki tangga sedikit, dan landaiii landai.. melalui beberapa batang pokok yang dijadikan tambatan, melalui sungai yang airnya kering dan akhirnya bakal sampai ke kem pertama, iaitu Sg Cakah Dua. 

Selepas kem yang pertama, perjalanan agak menaik sedikit demi sedikit dan ini kalilah betis betis yang dah lama berehat akan terpaksa dikerahkan agak keras untuk mengajar dan memulangkan rasa "layan" kembali ke dalam diri..Selepas 2 jam lebih dari kem site pertama anda akan sampai ke kem Batu Mat Hassan. Dan disini kami berhenti untuk lunch disini sambil menunggu yang lain tiba. Suasana di kem site kem site yang ada sangatlah meruntun jiwa. Betapa tenangnya kurniann Ilahi... cuma tak ada air terjun/sungai je kalau tak mesti lagi padu

tree who looks very sexy, dont know whether someone skinned out the tree or what. haha 

Dan selepas mula sahaja mengerahkan sepasang kaki dari kem mat hassan ni, kami melalui lagi 2500km perjalanan yang mencanaknya boleh tahan menguji juga. Selepas 1 jam lebih berjalan kami sampai ke Jendela Pandang dimana tempat itu kan menyajikan pandangan gunung berbalam balam yang masyaAllah sangat indah. Selepas dari Jendela Pandang akan terus mencanak dengan ketinggian yang kalau dengan sabar kita layan, small matter. WAHAHA. Tetapi perjalanan terasa agak jauh disebabkan kami disajikan dengan sign board2 yang menunjukkan berapa lagi anda akan sampai ke puncak. Sesetengah orang bisa menjadi mental apabila melihat sign board2 tersebut.

Keberadaan anda dari Jendela Pandang ke puncak pula akan mengambil masa dalam 2 jam paling kurang pun sebab nya waktu sampai ke puncak group pertama dalam pukul 4 lebih. Sampai sahaja di puncak, saya dan waktu itu berjalan bersama abang silat terus dikerahkan abang sham (group pertama sampai) untuk ke kem site yang terletak di bawah puncak. Bawah disini kami  harulaslah menuruni 500 meter. Di kem site tersebut kami disajikan dnegan view yang ya Allah ya Rabbi indahnya. Boleh nampak gunung2, nampak bandar2, dan nampak pulau dan laut. FULL PACKAGE. Water point juga ada, tapi harus turun dalam lebih kurang 400 meter/15 minit ke bawah dari kem site. Oklah buat mandi, ambil wudu dan bekalan air untuk esok. 

Malam tu makan mewah, terima kasih kak syida dan kak syila masak. SEDAPNYAAAAA Tak ku tipu. Nasi beriani, ayam daging kari, sayur campur yang ada nenas tu dan ayam masak merah. MERIAH KAAAAN!!?? Tak sempat nak ambil gambar. huh. Penyesalan, tapi serius semua orang dah kebulur melantok lah kami dengan penuh rasa kesyukuran..Malam tu macam biasalah sembang sembang dengan rakan rakan, siapkan nak masak apa untuk esok dan tidur. Ingatkan taklah sejuk tidur ramai ramai sempit sempit sekali sejuk je kooo. Malam tu tersedar tiba tiba tidur tak pakai tudung. Diaaaaaaaaa punya cuak ya rabbi, tercari cari kenapa boleh tertanggal ni. Esoknya akak akak sebelah menyebelah mengadu muka kena tampor la, kena sepak lah bagai. Lasak rupanya iols tidur. kAH!

muka tak mandi buroknyaaaa. dah mandi pun macam tu je jugak. wahahaha

 line up (ada yang tiada dalam gambar)

 dengan rakan gaduh. hahaha

 akak akak yang sempoiii

 kak syida yang ku sayangi dan sempoi ^^

perbuatan tidak bertanggungjawab dan hjahilnya. rosak pandangan tahu tak. haihhh

Pagi tu saya dan abang bani memasaaaaaaaaaaaak! the fun things to do is cooking seriously. Dalam hutan la, kalau kat rumah tak sempat nak memasak, bukak tudung saji dah ada makanan. wakahkah. Eh, abang bani je masak sebenarnya, i olls jadi pembantu basuh tu basuh ni, pegang kuali dan tukang rasa je. kehkeh. Selepas memasak panggil diorang makan dan bersiap sedia untuk tukar baju raya dan bergambar. Meriah sangat uolssss. Memang fun laaa.Terima kasih Allah. Lepas tu siap siap semua dan bergerak naik ke puncak tebu kembali untuk sesi bergambar.

Perjalanan turun berlaku dengan agak pantas sebab pukul 1 lebih kitorang dah sampai dekat bawah sungai air hijau ni. Ya ampun seroknya ya rabbi main air dengan tali tu ramai ramai. HAHAHAAHA. Dari air sungai nak ke tempat bermula lebih kurag 5/10 m init je. Agak agak dalam dua jam lah jugak main air. Mengigil gigil engkooo.

Dan malam tu singgah makan di tepi Laut Kelumut ke apa entah namanya. Dan bulan malam tu bersatu dengan awan dan cahaya menjadikan para mata yang memandang terpukau disebabkan kecantiknanya. Dan kami pun bergerak pulang ke kuala lumpur dan berakhir sudah trip trip manja ni. Balik, esoknya sakitanya kaki ya masyaALLAH sampai lah ke la ni...

A BAD DAY IT IS

It seems today's gonna be a lunatic day for me. PHEW. So, today I've got my result for semester 5. AND as expected, i failed one of the subject. People often says, or there is this one quote that says "never show your weaknesses to the other, they will take the chance to ruin you" or something like that la. But i am waaaaaaaay more honest than you look. As the sun starts to sunshine brightly, i innocently whatsapping my housemate's group asked them "hey hows your result" and one person replied "alhamdulillah". Then i started to feel insecure, then i start to tell the group that i failed one subject and there goes " krik krik krik". You know.. this results thingy sometimes are so sensitive that you can't tell that freely to your friends unless they are truly your best friend/someone who understand you. But things happened. Anyway..I kind of redha la with this result....but kinda of sad too.. cause...im gonna learn back all the stuffs that i f***** hate.. and i dont know..may Allah ease this last semester for me. I just cursed and now i asked Allah to helps me.. Duh... hahahaha

the others bad things happened today is like all the vehicles want to hit me and crash me off. and i lost. yup SESAT. I was in the middle of thinking of what my future is going to be and as you know Shah Alam has lottttttttttttt a mouthful loads of roundabouts. So here i went to this one road that leads me to hundreds of dizziness roundabout. And as i tried to return back to the road that familiar to me.... *deadpan and sighing*. I was so excited earlier as i said to my friends " yeaaa hari nak keluar awal nak datang pejabat awal" and went off with angkuh face. Hahahaha. But i think this thing of " off to work earlier" just doesn't work to a human named aqila safuan.

WELL, it doesn't to be a bad day at all comparing of what happened to me and to the other sides of the world. Gaza, syria, rohingya all the muslims that all the times facing obstacles as muslims and my problems are nothing compared to them..

Thank you Allah, and i am sorry mama.. i will try to do my best during the last semester.....

honesty

I always thought that being honest is always a very good act that we can do and practice. I mean, we all do lie often to be in the good side, to prove that we are not actually wrong or you are just a liars to be at the beginning of your smelly breath on the day you are borned to see the world. KAH. I am living my life by believing that you must try as hard as you can to be honest. Unless, *under some circumstances*

Anyway, having to sacrificed my only one and a half months of holiday just for practical course is something that i dont really fancy. (But now that i have been here in the office for days and seems like the workers here are like coming from heaven and all they do is giving me duit raya, i do seems to be fancy of this *chuckle*) .You are in part 5, and another one semester left, and although all you do during the second last semester is ponteng kelas, and only had dragon fire breath during the weeks of final examination, but still i do need holiday . Holiday from all the im-not-doing-well-in-exam-so-gonna-repeat-some-of-the-papers-but-first-let-me-enjoy-the-sugar-sweet-melancholy-of-this-heavenly-free-time and yup here comes "practical thingy". 

So, this one morning during my seat browsing the internet on this cozy red chair, the boss assistant called us saying that the boss wanna meet us. Here goes the nervous movement, eyes went juling, fingers went freezing, bulu starts coming out from my ears and please stop that qila. HAhaha..a...aaa Because that day will be the first time we meet personally with the boss, and it is a norm to be nervous when this occasion comes right? 

And all the nervousness went nothing. He seems so niceeeeeeeeeeeeee. Nope. he is niceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee . Seriously, i think he is in his forty, but still look young and cool and his office looks very neat and calming. He asked where we study, our course, and bla bla blaa.. until this question came out from his mouth "cita cita nak jadi apa?"

Then..here..it..comes..the.."honest moment with your 1/1/2 months boss"

"em..saya nak jadi suri rumah." with proud face and a bit of prettiness. (kahkah)

The boss looked at me with shock-controlled-expression and with some nodded movement. After he asked the other girl with the same question, he looked back at me like a father who worries about his daughter that occasionally get drunk every night and taking ganja with her friends, acting like monyet in the public, wears clothes like kim kardashian and etc..

he said

"awak tak boleh macam tu bla bla bla... ...kita sekarang ni zaman lain bla bla bla......kena ada cita cita,,,cita cita kena besar.bla bla bla...hidup zaman ni hidup sara tinggi..perempuan zaman sekarang bla bla bla... .....zaman degree dulu bla bla bla... awak belajar guna duit mak ayah awak kena bla bla bla..."

After he ends his speech i was so .. *deadpanned* i was not expecting this actually. Nor that i wanted to hear he compliment me because of the dream i have. I'm just so speechless of being that stupid. I could not foresee that the company that i have been doing my practical is a high class company..i mean...i know that the company is a very structural organised company but still my immature attitude cannot be hidden even.....but.....and...now....what would he thinks of me...i must be like burung gagak suara kepit that lost her kepak to him. My first impression to the boss was so devastating. Can you feel me? Can youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu? *kesat air mata nanah*

but still, he is very nice.

May Allah ease his life dunya akhirat.

still into you

Thought that i have been stop liking you since i unfollowed you from any social networks which obviously you, not even one try to follow me back. I dont really care if this happen with other people, but hey im crushing on you. You should give me some feedback lah . bukan kah patutnya? kahkah

I think it was about for 3 months that when nights come and you are not in my mind, not stalking you anymore, and im okay with that. I thought. But..i think it was because i have been actively hiking and some guys have been entering in and out of my mind constantly and i thought naaah,

But in just one moment, you appeared back on my mind , and now i have been actively stalking you back like a retarded fat dugong who have a dream to marry a prince. Of course, you are not like the prince. You are just a jerk that have good face (im not quite sure with this), nice talent, and some ruined attitudes and mental disability and bajet bagus and whatevah.

And during this Ramadhan, i happened to be having a practical course in Shah Alam, which is quite okay for me up until now. But the other days, didah came and requested to solat Terawih at Masjid UiTM Shah Alam, and then i remembered this one crucial extraordinary moment happen at the masjid during the old days back when i still study at Shah Alam. 

Back then when i was so crazy about him, that even in my prayer i asked Allah to give me a hint, if he is the one for me, he should be up in front of me during this prayer. That time we were asked to berjemaah together with boys at the front, and girls at the back.  

IT REALLLLLLLLLLLY HAPPENED. After we finished our prayer, right after that i was just looking at the front crowd and he was there, sat in front of me wearing baju melayu in green color. And that moment, i was seriously shocked. I mean, who would not be shocked right? Its like Allah have gave me a hint that he is the one for me, and i liked him so much back then. and of course he was not and still not likes me but woooo. That was big vent for me. Although only me and Allah knows. 

But i dont know, up untill now, he still doesnt know me ( he might just basically know me, and i appear to be a girl who seems familiar to him la kot, haha). And i have feelings too, to be loved so i thought what really happened back then was just a gift from Allah bagi mengubati hatiku yang lara dan lama sangat syok sendiri.

Since i have been making and know a lot of guys friends, many guys come into my mind and i thought yeah why not try to like some other guys than him. And it was just okay for me to adjust and like other guys. Try to give my own self the opportunity. But it doesnt seems right. The feels.

But for now, lets just follow the flows.

Because feelings changed. and they do changed.